Sunday, January 24, 2010
Decision Time
It has come time to decide whether to remain a part of the mission trip to Haiti. The decision is weighing so heavily on me. To go or not to go. I have played each scenario over and over in my head of whether to help those in Haiti or to help my family and Josie with this period of transition. Josie has been great, but she relies on my wife a lot, which leaves me to do a bigger part of caring for our other children and helping take care of daily living. My back pack is still packed and sitting in my bedroom and every time I see that bag I find myself wanting to be part of each scenario. But I only get a limited time to bond with a little girl before I head back to work, and it is so hard to give up that time to go to Haiti. I feel like each decision lets someone down. My wife has been great, and is willing to support me no matter what I choose, but I know she wants me to stay. I can't ever remember a more difficult decision in my life.
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Dear Todd - All along my "gut" was telling me that you need to be at home, I wouldn't tell you that. It had to be your decision, and not me pushing you one way or another.
ReplyDeleteYou have my greatest respect and support for your decision, either way. I could see the anguish on your face, each time we had a Haiti meeting. It gnawed at me, and I kept wanting to tell you to stay home. I believe it was in God's plan to cause us to stay in GR so that you would be available to get Josie in Miami. I also believe that you ARE helping Haiti by being here for Josie, Kelly and the rest of your family. If you don't do what is right for you, you cannot do what is right for others. Stay strong. Stay with Josie. Give her a strong start with her new family.
Stop fretting. Snuggle Josie. Kiss Kelly, and sleep well.
Your Haiti team will look for you to join us on another trip.
God bless you.
Mary